There is something I have noticed a lot of sewers do and I am also guilty of this, and it is counteracting every compliment of a hand made garment with the dreaded sewers “But” ….. (one T). But I made a mess of the zip, but I put this piece in wrong, but the pattern is not matching. Why are we incapable of accepting a compliment and believing in ourselves as good sewers.
A long time ago I read an article about compliments and how upsetting and dismissive it was when someone had paid you a compliment to reject it and put them down by not accepting it. It was hard for me to start with but I used to make sure that I acknowledged every nice thing that was said to me, accepting with grace, but ensuring the person who had paid the compliment was aware I appreciated them and their effort at saying so. How much effort does a “Why, Thank you” or “You are so kind” and a smile of gratitude take and hopefully like a small ripple in a pond, that compliment will be passed on to others and bring a little joy to everyone’s world.
However, what level of sewing skills should we be happy with. I am constantly striving for better skills and more techniques, never satisfied with what I have achieved. With all the information and publicity on mental health at the moment is this a good thing? Possibly not. I see the smiles on new sewers faces when they have completed their first garment, I can see the fit isn’t right, the seams are all wonky and the inside is a mess, but what right have I to judge? I have none at all. Maybe what I am feeling is jealousy at the contentment and joy they are feeling at having achieved something new, which is a feeling I left behind a long time ago. Hopefully, the fact that I have recognised this will help me to improve not only my attitude to perfection but also bring back my joy in the simple things.
This is a great message x
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Thank you. 😊
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I’m hopeless at accepting compliments. When it comes to sewing I feel I have to apologise for it being hand sewn and yet others are amazed I can sew bits of fabric together to make a garment. I’m a bit of a perfectionist so the finish is never to my satisfaction.
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I am the same. Being a perfectionist is not a problem but not realising how well you have done might be. Enjoy your sewing 😊
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Yes! Why are we so hard on ourselves? Sewing is a masterful skill, one most people I interact with do not have. Its definitely OK to celebrate our accomplishments and accept those compliments!
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Exactly. We need to be proud of what we achieve whatever our skill levels are.
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It is a good message….I think it’s a British thing to be self-deprecating, not to think we’re something we’re not, that we grew up with? I’ve always called myself an imperfecionist ….’ better done than perfect’ though as I take my time and slow down I am leaving this behind a little. However I still get really excited when I’ve just finished something and have to share somewhere….ig being my favoured spot….. and rarely wait until I can get the perfect photo! Let the imperfection continue alongside the joy, whilst still improving
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I could not have put it better myself Judith. Xx
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